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A UNIQUE DATING SITE EXPERIENCE

eHarmony.com is quite possibly, one of the most unique dating sites online. It is very easy to tell from the beginning that the company is serious about finding the most-suited partner for their customers. They absolutely go the extra mile with in-depth personality gathering and a graduated, step-by-step process leading to full communication to accomplish their task of finding the most appropriate matches for their clients.

COMPREHENSIVE SYSTEM OF MATCHING

eHarmony.com utilizes a highly thought-out and comprehensive system based on the theory that there are hundreds of dimensions every person possesses and by cross-analyzing detailed aspects of an individual’s personality, the system creates highly compatible matches for you.

eHarmony.com is not your typical pick-em-as-you-see-them buffet of humankind most other dating sites out there seem to be about. When you sign up on eHarmony.com , you must complete an in-depth personality survey that requires about an hour or more of your precious time. The survey delves into hundreds of personality-dimensions, then uses your responses to cross match you with other highly compatible eHarmony members. At this point you are presented with only profiles of members who are scientifically-picked using a comprehensive program algorithm and represent only those that are considered highly compatible with you.

MORE WOMEN THAN MEN ON EHARMONY

Of course this approach weeds-out a lot of individuals who would otherwise have been entirely inappropriate for you, the eHarmony client. This tends to bring a more serious crowd to the table as men only looking for one-night stands are highly unlikely to sign-up with this service since. The focus is definitely more long-term, relationship-oriented individuals who are willing to invest a little time and effort into finding their soul mate.

Typically, most men find it very difficult to answer questions about themselves and to be in touch with their emotions to this extent. Filling-out the extensive personality profile requires utilizing a person’s right-brain and connecting with both halves of the brain connected. Women generally have much more connecting tissue between both hemispheres of their brain, and tend to be more right-brained, thereby making this type of system much more comfortable to them.

As a result the site inherently caters to much more serious-minded, sensitive and understanding, long-term relationship-oriented men. Inasmuch, eHarmony has accomplished a phenomenon just about no other dating site has been able to claim: there seems to be twice as many women on eHarmony than there are men. On most other dating sites, the men far outnumber the women in a ratio of 70-30.

In realizing these dynamics, the good thing for women using this site is they can know the men on this site at least know how to use their right brain since they went through the process of analyzing themselves in detail in taking the required personality profile.

THE WAY EHARMONY WORKS

The way eHarmony.com works is that after you sign up and fill out the in-depth personality profile, you are presented with new matches on a regular basis. But, this occurs only as the system determines your compatibility and match-potential with the database of other eHarmony members in your potential range. These are individuals that are normally "highly-compatible" with you based on comprehensive scientific relationship research cross-matching. The system cross-matches individuals based on dozens of dimensions including 29 "vital" dimensions dealing in the areas of emotional health, family values, personality, and character.

As a paying member, you may request communication with any of your matches but you must wait for the system to actually match you. If a match agrees to communicate with you then you are taken through another three step process to further weed-out or gradually allow you to openly email them.

Below you’ll find the basic process leading to free and open communication with your system matches.

Step 1: Multiple Choice Questions. You select five personality/character/relationship oriented multiple choice questions from a predetermined list that is presented to the other person to answer. They do the same in return and you must answer these to proceed to the next step and eventual open communication.

Step 2: You submit your “Must Have” and “Must Have Not’s” list that shows your match the issues you "must have" in a partner (i.e., loyalty, organized, chemistry, faith and so forth) and things you "can't stand" in a partner (i.e. couch potato, loudness, neat-freak, sloppiness, atheist, racist and so forth).

Step 3: You submit three "open-ended" questions the other person must answers. You can select from a list of predetermined questions or write your own.

Step 4: You are now in the open communication phase and can freely communicate with the other person.

Anytime during this process, if either person feels uncomfortable with the match or they believe the “Must Have” and “Must Have Not’s” are unacceptable to them you or the other person can "close" the match and graduated communication leading to open communication at any step along the way and prior to the match actually receiving your personal email address.

In using this method of scientific personality matching and graduated levels of communication leading to open free communication, you are almost ensured the person on the other end is going to be someone who is highly compatible with you.

YOUR EHARMONY "ABOUT YOU" PROFILE

Your “About You” questions on the eHarmony Questionnaire and Personality Profile can be challenging to complete…even for those with experience in writing. While some attempt to write flashy and exaggerated points about themselves, others tend to freeze-up and not give enough nor valid insight into their lives.

Remember, the goal here is to portray the real-you so as to find your most compatible match. If you try to be someone you’re not, you will most likely be matched with incompatible individuals.

To avoid mistakes and possible lost content, along with having the luxury of taking your time with your profile, it’s always a good idea to first type your profile in a word processor and then copy and paste it into the eHarmony form.

Below you will find a guide addressing each of the eHarmony questions to helping you fill-out your “About You” questionnaire.

1. What are you most passionate about? What are your most important life beliefs, goals or pursuits?

Of course the term passion for the purpose of this eHarmony profile means something more than issues of love between two people. Of course it could mean a romantic get-away with your love or enjoying dinner in a beautiful restaurant along the coast. But for a broader picture, think about what activities you enjoy doing most and what aspects of life do you appreciate. As you fill-out this section, think about what you get excited about and what helps to give you hope in life. Do you like to go hiking, surfing, art galleries or perhaps dancing all night long? Maybe you find more purpose in volunteering your time for a worthy cause or possibly leading a church Bible study. Remember, it’s what you really enjoy doing in life.

2. "What are the THREE things for which you are most thankful?"

Here, once again, you need to first be honest real. Pretend you are sitting down with the love of your life talking in real terms. You can either approach this is a humorous way, such as, the moment my dog stops barking, or when the alarm clock has had it’s say. Alternately, you may chose to answer in a more practical way such as, a good job, roof over my head and health. Whatever way you choose to answer this question, remember that you want to portray the real, unique person you are.

3. Other than your parents who has been the most influential person in your life, and why?

Think back on someone who left a strong impression on you sometime in your life and the reason they left such a legacy. Maybe it was your high school math teacher who spent extra time with you after class to ensure you understood the ins and outs of trigonometry. Or maybe a grand parent who taught you many aspects of wisdom throughout your life. Consider who elicits a feeling of warmness when they come to your mind.

4. The four things your friends say about you are:

Here, eHarmony takes answers automatically from those you provided when you take the Relationship Questionnaire; you can change them whenever you wish. To change these answers from the automatically populated ones, just click the "Edit" link next to the question, deselect the descriptions you'd like to change, and select four checkboxes that you feel best suit you before saving. Your new selections will now appear on your "About Me" profile.

5. What are three of your best life skills?

eHarmony also automatically populates the answers you provided from those answered when you took the Relationship Questionnaire.; you can change them whenever you wish also. To change these answers from the automatically populated ones, just click the "Edit" link next to the question, deselect the descriptions you'd like to change, and select four checkboxes that you feel best suit you before saving. Your new selections will now appear on your "About Me" profile.

6. What are some of the most important qualities that you are looking for in a potential romantic partner?

Provide in your own words what the most important qualities are that you are looking for in a mate. It may be a kind and loving nature, romantic ways, intelligence, athletic ability or any of a multitude of other qualities that are important to you. Simply answer this question honestly and forthright. The eHarmony’s Compatibility Matching System® will step-in and actually decide on the most appropriate match for you based on a multitude of factors.

7. Other than your appearance, what is the first thing that people notice about you?

When someone meets you for the first time, what's the one non-appearance quality about yourself that you think most people discern? What is the best quality that you offer to others when you first meet them? Is it your ability to connect on their level, your self-confidence, your friendliness, your sense of humor, or perhaps your intelligence?

8. What is the ONE thing that people DON'T notice about you right away that you WISH they WOULD?

The entire concept of the “About You” profile is to let your prospective matches learn as much as possible about you. These questions and answers will be presented to those you are matched with. So, now is the opportunity to let someone know more of your true nature right from the start. Take the opportunity to let them know in the answer to this question number 7 all the things that you wish others would see about you right from the start. Perhaps you want others to see your humorous side more, or your compassionate nature; once again, really dig deep to expose your inner-self to your prospective matches.

9. How do you spend your leisure time typically?

Think here about the things you do to relax, the things that cause you to feel more at ease with life. Consider the places you go on the weekend or for vacations. If you are an outdoor or sports person, give a little detail nature of your activities. If you are into church life then get a little bit specific and tell of the types of programs or ministries you are involved in. If you spend a lot of time at home watching TV or using the Internet, then let your matches know a little about the type of programs you watch or internet activity you enjoy.

10. What are five things that you "can't live without?"

If you consider the things in life that, if they were taken away from you would make your life less enjoyable, then these are the things that you would want to list here. Things like coffee, chocolate, intimacy or friends. But don’t limit yourself, other things such as broadband internet or cable television might also be on this list. Try to avoid the obvious answer that many use in this part of the survey. If you say something to the effect, “air, food, water, shelter,” then this may be perceived as smug or arrogant and your potential match may move past your survey to the next.

11. Describe the last book that you read and enjoyed. What was it about? What did you like most about it?

Be honest here; if you are not a book person don’t list a book you read in high school. This part of the survey is an opportunity for you to let the person know what kind of general media content you enjoy, whether it’s magazines, movies, theater, opera or any other arts. Get specific here and talk about the last magazine you read, movie, play or opera you watched. Remember, not everyone has a schedule that allows valuable time to read 1000 page novels. If you are an avid book fan, then

12. Describe one thing about yourself that only your best friends know.

eHarmony is not suggesting that you detail your darkest secrets here but rather, when answering this question, consider that your close friends see you at your best and worst. You may wish to detail something that these friends know about you in your best or worst moods. These may be character issues or idiosyncrasies about you that may not necessarily be apparent to individuals who meet you for the first time. In other words, this question once again offers the opportunity to be open and honest.

13. Is there any additional information you would like your matches to know about you?

eHarmony offers this opportunity for you to get a little bit creative here. Remember that this is the last question your potential match will see prior to deciding to communicate with you or not. You may want to add some little-known fact or accomplishment about yourself from grade school or tell about the blue ribbon you won at a hotdog eating contest years ago. This question allow for an additional opportunity to be creative and offer some additional insight into your character.

In Conclusion

Remember, your profile answers can be changed or edited at any time. It’s a good idea to fine-tune your answers from time-to-time as you reconsider and recall your life-events, personal character and issues that make-up a human being. This will better assist your potential matches in choosing a potential life partner who is truly compatible.

Copyright 2005 Dating Director Review - Last Update: 7/20/2009


Disclaimer:
Please note the following: Most of the above information was taken from the eHarmony.com site or from other public sources. While we always try to update this information in a timely fashion and avoid mistakes as much as possible, there is always the possibility that information is outdated, or simply wrong. Please check the dating service homepage for the most recent information. If you're using a coupon code, discount code, promotional code of other special offer, please ensure that they work, and the discount is applied before finalizing the order. This is entirely your responsibility.  Dating Directory Review and its owner are in no way responsible for any issues regarding coupon or discount use. 

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